Colbert wins the only Presidential primary that matters, handily dispatching Jon Stewart head to head

Strength to strength, clip to clip, Stephen Colbert faced down and dispatched his most credible competitor for the 2008 Presidential race, Jon Stewart. Last week, Rolling Stone revealed that Stephen Colbert had won The Great American Fake-Off accompanied by a "possible cash award" (which as any Washington political insider can tell you, is code for off-the-books cash "campaign contribution", usually seen with politicians that get incredibly lucky at cards, in casinos, or even "rest stops" - there's a couple of other examples out there of how incredibly lucky politicians get when gambling, especially when playing cards with campaign contributors, but we couldn't put our collective finger on them). We're eagerly awaiting Jon's concession call and pledge of support.